Get Off the Self-Fed Bullshit Diet: 5 Steps to Living in Truth

Get Off the Self-Fed Bullshit Diet: 5 Steps to Living in Truth

I’m going to ask you a really tough question. Ready? When’s the last time you called yourself out for making excuses?

Like there’s either something you know you need to do, a change you know you have to make, or maybe a lesson you know you have to learn – but for whatever reason, you just don’t want to.

So, instead of facing the music, you come up with some seemingly valid reason to avoid it.

Every time you justify an action or an inaction, or rationalize a fear – do you ever think, “Wow, I’m really making myself a bullshit sandwich here, aren’t I?”

Here’s the problem: the Bullshit Diet works until it doesn’t. Because it does shield us from challenge, risk, and sometimes even dark introspection, but it also keeps us from growth, adventure, and overall improvement.

So how do we stop feeding ourselves bullshit and courageously step into living in the truth of a moment? First, we gotta talk about why we’re on the Bullshit Diet in the first place.

1. We don’t want to do the work

We don’t want to make sacrifices. We’re discouraged by the idea of hard work or an uphill climb. The thought of pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones, or challenging ourselves, nauseates us.

As if we start off in defeat. 

We don’t want to do the work, so instead, we feed ourselves bullshit. We tell ourselves that trying something wouldn’t work anyway,  or that the chances of success are slim to none, or that so many have tried and almost all have failed – so what’s the point? We start justifying our inaction by drowning ourselves in how we’re not good enough, and we start creating limiting stories to make sense of these new limitations.

It’s the easiest thing in the world to come up with a million and one reasons it wouldn’t work out whenever reaching our goals or getting what we want requires some sort of sacrifice.

We don’t want to do the work, so we come up with reasons why the work isn’t worth doing. So we feed ourselves bullshit.

2. We’re terrified of change

We don’t want things to change. We don’t want to be alone, or risk the unknown, or try something new. We don’t want to face what failing may mean if we leap. We let fear guide our decision-making. Heck, we let fear guide everything.

We’re terrified of change, so instead, we make up worst case scenarios and come up with every reason as to why that worst case will be the likelier outcome. We make excuses, like thinking it’s too late to do this or I’m not smart enough for that. We justify staying stagnant and rationalize our fears because it’s easier than having to admit we’re scared.

We’re terrified of change, so we come up with reasons why it’s safer to stay where we are. So we feed ourselves bullshit.

3. It’s easier to blame others.

We don’t want to own up to our mistakes; it’s so much easier to blame others than it is to take a good, hard look at some of our own shortcomings. We don’t want to admit we played a role in the destruction of a relationship or in a deal falling through or something not panning out. We don’t want to take responsibility for our actions or inactions resulting in where we are today.

We don’t want to take the blame, so instead, we blame everyone else. We blame circumstances. We play the victim. We create this story that literally everyone else is at fault except us. That if x,y, and z were different then maybe our lives would be, too.

We don’t want to step up, so we come up with reasons why it’s everyone’s (and everything’s) fault but our own. So we feed ourselves bullshit.

But it’s all bullshit.

Your bullshit diet is keeping you drunk and it’s keeping you stuck, exactly where you are. You’ve removed all reason for growth, change, and personal development.

So without having to face the reality that growth only happens when you push, stretch, and act; or that change may be terrifying, but it’s inevitable and it almost always comes with some sort of blessing; or that no matter what, you always play a role in your own experiences, you stay hidden behind the bullshit.

But you have to step out into your truth, because if you don’t, what the fuck is the point to all this?

Living in truth means being open. Being raw. Being vulnerable. Being you in all shapes and sizes – right? Broken, scarred, terrified.

This is where growth happens. This is how you build courage and self-confidence.

Life isn’t always going to hand you rainbows and butterflies, and being in denial about it isn’t the solution. Stuffing yourself with bullshit to prolong the inevitable, to mask parts of yourself that need work, or to avoid taking risks in your life is not going to suddenly make the world less scary. All you’re doing with this Bullshit Diet is creating a world that isn’t truly meant for you.

Because you’re meant for so much more.

I know you see it. I know that every time you try to justify a decision or rationalize a fear, I know you sense you’re doing it.

So, it’s time to stop feeding yourself bullshit and start living in truth because everything you want – all your goals, your dreams, whatever – that’s where they live.

Here are the 5 Steps to ending the Bullshit Diet:

Step 1: Ask yourself why you’re feeding yourself bullshit. What’s the root? What are you scared of? What are you avoiding? And be as honest and transparent with yourself as possible. Hint: It helps to play the toddler game, Why. For example: I don’t want to leave my shitty job. Why? Because there aren’t many positions out there for me where I’d get hired. Why? Because there are other applicants that would probably get it before me. Why? Because I don’t think I’m as good as they are.

Step 2: Get really clear on the roots of your Bullshit Diet.  Are you afraid to face your monsters? So after you ask your why, get really clear about the reasons you make all of these excuses. Do you struggle with self-esteem? This is really important stuff to be aware of, not only so you can start to work on those issues, but also because as soon as you bring them to light, it’s going to help keep you from going back to the bullshit.

Step 3: Make a conscious effort to do the scary stuff. Meaning, question everything you think. If your go-to response to something is to make an excuse for it, you have to recognize that as bullshit and call yourself out on it.

Step 4: Get rid of bullshit endorsers. You may not have blatantly toxic relationships in your life, but you need to know how to call out people who support your excuse making. The enablers. Try swapping them out for some loving, but brutally honest friends to help call you out on your shit.

Step 5: Set the stage for courage. This means for the courage you’re going to have when you step up and make sacrifices for the things you want, or face your fears, or look inward at the parts of yourself that need work. And when you do act courageously – when you take that step in facing the truth over choosing the easy way, hiding behind the bullshit, learn to reward yourself for it.

It ain’t easy, but it’s definitely fucking worth it.

Because here’s the thing: It really boils down to two choices. You can either continue to feed yourself bullshit and stay where you are or you can be brave and face your truth, because that’s where the gold is. 

The gold is in the growth that happens when you decide to do the work. It’s in the thrill of facing your fears and embracing the excitement of change. It’s in learning to turn inward to reflect and rely on yourself for strength by taking ownership of the role you play in your own life.

And yeah, it’s going to be gloomy for a bit. You’re removing all the shit that makes you go numb and you’re learning to own it. You’re learning to push yourself and be brave and that’s going to mean having to strip down and do the work.

Believe me, it’s worth it.

And if this hasn’t convinced you yet, maybe this will. Imagine, for a second, that you choose to do nothing. Imagine you keep feeding yourself bullshit, making excuses for everything, and you stay exactly where you are now.

How’s that bullshit taste now?

Alright! I have an AWESOME challenge for you if you’re feeling shittier than usual about yourself.

MORE AWESOME

Chiara
chiara@boldself.com

Chiara Mazzucco is an Empowerment Coach whose mission is to help you build confidence, establish self-worth, and get rid of toxic relationships. She’s the former CEO of a national online and print magazine, author of The 9 Mirages of Love, and creator of personal development online courses like Revamp Bootcamp and the Feel Awesome Masterclass.

1Comment
  • Aleksandra
    Posted at 15:34h, 22 February Reply

    Getting out of the denial zone can be one of the scariest, most painful and most difficult things in one’s life – but it can be also most rewarding!

Post A Comment